Alysse's fanfiction draft

The Lovely Bones, Fan Fiction. 

Footsteps silently crept behind me. 

I turned around suddenly but no one was there.

The silent footsteps began to feel closer and closer. I started running. 

Her first smile, first laugh. Her first step and her first fall. Her first words made me laugh as I remembered. Every memory and every moment I spent with her were flooding back as if we were re-living every memory.

I woke up in a daze. It was dark. Cold. Damp.

Almost silent, but a slight whistle of wind and a faint whimper of breath. 

"Whose there? Where am I?" 

No response but a deep inhaling sigh, and a loud creek of an old wooden door.

I asked again. Again, until a match was struck and a flicker of light spread from the top of a ladder to be in what looked like a cave? 

"Hello?" 

Had who ever that was following me finally caught up?

Slowly I moved, I stood up and looked into the direction of where the flicker of light had come from. I froze. There where 2 eyes steering back into mine. 

Gently a dark silhouette emerged from the top of the ladder. Smiling he carefully climbed down into the cave I thought I must be in. He gently walked over to me as if I was fragile. He laughed. 

Feeling isolated and lonely I asked myself again, "Who is this man?"

As he laughed, he became closer until I could see every detail on his pulsating face. He looked pleased with himself. Succeeded. 

I backed off slowly.

He asked my name. I did not reply.

"Mr Harvey it is, I live across the street from you."

"Your the Salmon girl?"

"Susie Salmon."

        

Sickness grew as I watched him. He looked confident. His body language was calm, his expressions showed no remorse. 

Around me was what looked to be the earth? Dug deep into the ground. The walls were dense, mud, supported by handmade wooden pillars. Slow drips of water leaked from the celling. Children's teddy bears and china dolls lined the walls. Pictures and candles, toys and books. Had a child made this?

I ran my fingers over each individual picture. As I moved slowly between each wall I carefully ran my fingers over my mothers face.

** Her first smile, first laugh. Her first step and her first fall. Her first words made me laugh as I                                           remembered. Every memory and every moment I spent with her were flooding back as if we were re-   living every memory.

"I wanted to show you what I built Susie. I built it for all the kids in the neighborhood, as a secret den. You’re the first to see it.”

Ignoring him, I realised what I had just come across, my mother. His face dropped as I starred straight into his eye.

He grabbed me as I scuttled up the ladder, pulling my leg and slipping, hitting my head on the last step. As I got up I slipped again in a puddle from the leaking roof. I couldn’t stand up.

Panicking in and out of conciousness, Mr Harvey bent down next to me. He comforted me. Putting his cold shaking hand on my shoulder he began to whisper. So close I could feel his icy breath shiver down the side of my neck. He wanted to tell me something but I didn’t want to listen. “Abigail” He continued as I tuned in and out.

“Abigail” he faintly whispered again and again until he caught my attention.

He was saying my mothers name until I came too, I then remembered the photograph I had ran my fingers over. I pulled myself off the hard mud ground and ran over to where I had seen the picture.

Turning around I looked at Mr Harvey I didn’t have to question. A feeling of guilt struck through my body like a bolt of lightening.

“YOU”

I screamed, running towards him raging with anger. Suddenly the hideout became claustrophobic. The walls felt as if the were concaving in towards me. The celling seemed to have given in letting the rain pour straight from the sky. As I lifted my arm in aim of Mr Harvey, I froze.

I knew I wasn’t alone. The atmosphere transpired and began peaceful.

“Mum?”

        
           “Susie. Run or he will hurt you.”

As I gazed over I wondered how everything was so wrong. This was all to familiar. Mr Harvey, alone with no one else than his prey. How had he captured Susie the way he had killed me. Why had he killed me, me Abigail. Had that not been enough but to take my Susie as well and to put my family through this again. I was not going to let him.

I knew they could both feel my presence.

I stopped for a moment and from the corner of my eye I spotted a hammer. I slowly reached for it without Mr Harvey seeing.

As I lifted my arm for the second time, power grew within me. Mr Harvey put up his hands and as he did this, I felt as if I was not alone. I took a swing and in the split of a second, silence.

The silence was not creepy, not like before. The silence felt comforting and warm. I looked down to see Mr Harvey lying on the floor in a pool of blood. With the warm silence growing around me I knew then that I had killed the murderer of my mother, Abigail.